This is Going to Really Suck

Last week I flew to South Carolin with a layover in Atlanta. In the airport in Chicago a bunch of Navy boys fresh out of basic training were waiting to get on my flight, I suppose they were being stationed in Atlanta. So their families were allowed to accompany them to the gate. My gate. At first I was a little irritated because they were super rowdy teenagers. "Mom! Mom! Listen to this, Mom! I'm getting a tattoo! It's gonna be a giant fish inside the navy seal! YEAH!" There were lots of stray whores milling about, teenage girls draped over chairs and wrapped around the boys like snakes, "So, is the Navy like...a job?" I heard one of them ask. It was a nightmare. I made quick eyes with a non-navy Conan O'Brien lookalike sitting in a chair across from me. "Whoa" he mouthed. I laughed.

Then everything changed. Suddenly the Navy was asked to get in line to board the plane and all the moms simultaneously threw down their cameras and began weeping. Whores disappeared into the background as legitimate girlfriends and fiancees came forward, crying and shaking. It was like a scene out of a movie. Everyone else in the gate burst into applause as the Navy lined up. Fake Conan and I were both stunned and I teared up pretty bad, but I didn't applaud. I didn't know what to make of this...not supporting war and not supporting those who fight in wars seem very different to me. I needed to mull this one over.

By the time I boarded the plane however, the Navy kids were back to their bouncy cheering sailor mouthed selves which made for a long distracting flight, not at all helped by the pilot every now and then getting on the overhead and asking us to once again congratulate the Boot Camp graduates. This would lead to an echoing and deafening series of "Booo-YAAA's" from the Navy kids.

The man sitting next to me turned to me as we landed and sighed, "This is the loudest damn flight I've ever been on." I nodded and gave him my best, "Tell me about it" face.

But you know what? I looked around and I didn't see a bunch of rambunctious fresh from boot camp naval officers. I also didn't see the brave men and women fighting for our country. I just saw a bunch of teenage kids acting like teenage kids. And I'm saying this in a good way. I looked at them and thought, "My god, they are younger than my little brother. They are barely out of high school. They were born in the 90's!" And I just let it go. Because if these kids get a chance to act like kids for 90 minutes, who am I to hold it against them?

When we landed one of the boys behind me got out his cell phone. "Dude, I'm in Atlanta. I just got out of basic training. It sucked. I mean, it REALLY sucked." He got a little choked up here. "I kind of thought it was going to be fun, or at least...I don't know...not as hard as it was. I hate all these people, I hated it. This is going to really fucking suck." At that point it just clicked for me.

The pilot asked us to cheer one last time as we taxied into the gate for the Graduating Basic Training Officers and I cheered as loud as I possibly could.