There were cats on leashes, always hilarious.
There was cat paraphernalia, such as this "Nickel Bag" of catnip. I bought Lucy a toy that is similar to a toy my childhood cat Jasper adored. Lucy hated it. She makes a mean face at it and acts generally annoyed every time I bring it out. There were lots of cat clothes both for sale and on people's bodies. The man wearing the denim embroidered shirt that said "Purrr-fection" was a personal fav.
We watched cats get judged on their...cattiness. It seemed the awards were for best color, best of breed...I don't know. The judge would feel the cat up, look at it's ass, fling a toy at it then stick it back in the cage. The cats all seemed so calm and collected. These were total pageant cats. The ones we rooted for all won. I stopped saying things like "The ugly one" when it occurred to me their owners were everywhere.
They got ribbons.
We watched a performance by the Acro-Cats. These are trained cats. But trying to train a cat is similar, methinks, to trying to will the Clark bus to come. Not gonna happen. While most of the cats wandered around defiantly, this cat named Tuna sat and rang that bell like all nine lives depended on it. The trainer said Tuna had once rung the bell for ten minutes straight. Tell you what, if anyone comes into my house and teaches my cat to ring a bell for ten minutes straight you will get punched.
What qualifies one to become a cat judge I wonder? Is it based on your skill and knowledge? Or does someone just come to your house, take one look at your closet and say, "Yeah, you're in"?
Yeah, it's the Rock-Cats. These are basically the Acro-Cats sitting at fake instruments with a cassette tape playing behind them, but it still made me laugh. Really hard.
I'm not making fun of cat show. Some of these people were die hards. They had REALLY expensive and exotic cats. In fact, we didn't see a whole lot of NORMAL cats. (See previous post). I did see one little orange kitty that broke my heart (they are my weakness, any man trying to woo me should bring a bouquet of orange kittens instead of flowers.) You may think your newborn baby niece or nephew or child is cute...but you haven't come close to cute until you've been a witness to the kitten division of the Cat Contest where they line up all the damn weensy mewey kittens to compete.
Seriously, I think Lucy's window for being a show cat might be shut, although I think it would be amazing to try and walk her on a leash. It would also be amazing to see the judge test her reflexes (Lucy lies down...looks at the toy...looks at the judge...looks at me...takes a nap...meows...then flies off the podium to wildly chase a ghost bug...God I love her.) But I've decided that whenever I get my next cat, Fern, she will be a pageant cat. I can't wait. I'm going to get all dressed up in my cat gear and take little Fern to the DuPage County Fairgrounds and she's going to ring a bell for twenty minutes while standing on her head and wearing a tutu. I'm going to blow all her college money on her western wear outfit! Then she's going to win all the awards! And if she doesn't...well...she knows what happens then. "Fern enjoys being in Cat Shows, we wouldn't do it if she didn't enjoy it...honestly. Right, Fern? RIGHT, FERN?"
Also, my allergies almost killed me afterwards.
Cat Show!
No comments:
Post a Comment