I clicked on something.

I clicked on something and now the internet is in my house. The wireless internet. Apparantly the wireless internet has always been accessible but I've been paying for DSL instead...I'm going to investigate this. I don't know how much time I have. I'm sorry to constantly be writing these blogs like it's midnight in a prison camp and I've just found a flashlight and a laptop, my next blog will just be "SOS" but there are two more additions to yesterdays blog that I've been dying to tell you before I continue...

1) Sasha Cohen was also wearing a Kaballah bracelet. So, I win.

2) Upon closer examination of the cat yak on the linoleum in my kitchen, it appears that Lucy DOES indeed eat people food. And lots of it.

Onward.

Today was certainly a day. I ate a lot of duck at Erik and Jacobs and a big huge brownie too. It seemed like a good idea at the time, duck and brownie. Not such a good idea later on...feeling a little...you know....like you would if you ate a lot of duck and a big brownie.

Erik and Jacob don't have a microwave, isn't that strange? I found myself alone in their kitchen today and realized, "They don't have a microwave" and "Oh, they have a pet turtle." Amazing what you find and don't find in people's houses when they arn't looking.

Brannen was on the radio this morning. He was SOOOOO CUUUUUUTE. He was supposed to sing but there were technical difficulties so he chatted a lot in his "I'm on the radio" voice instead. I was proud.

I keep forgetting that Jeremy is in France, since I never see him anyway. Jeremy, I hope that you are having fun and that you will bring me a present.

I keep also forgetting that Trixie is in India. My friends are well travelled. Trix, bring me a bangle. Yeah, a bangle.

I came home today feeling bummed out for whatever lame reason and weighed my options.
1) Drink and go to sleep.
2) Write.
3) Work on your face.

I decided to write but got three pages of a very avant garde piece about dead ballerinas that I have been trying to approach for the last three years. I hated it, as usual, and quit. I don't know why these dead ballerinas keep coming back to haunt me, but they always end up speaking in really pretentious riddles. I almost figured them out tonight, but no dice. So I worked on my face instead.

While soaping up my face I had a little chat with my inuition. Here is how it went.

Intuition: Why do you ignore me sometimes?
Me: Oh, cause I don't like what you have to say. Or cause I want to be surprised?
Intuition: Surprised?
Me: Yeah, I always sort of know what's about to happen and it makes things dull.
Intuition: I see.
Me: Yeah, and also, sometimes I feel like maybe you'll be wrong.
Intuition: But I'm never wrong.
Me: I know, it's annoying.
Intuition: Well, I'll try to be less obvious.
Me: Thanks Lady.

Then I went back to work on the play that I'm really writing. And as instructed my intuition butted out and gave me no concept of whether or not this script is any good. So...we'll see?

Anyway, things seem to be on the rise because after fixing my face and chatting with my intuition and trying to knit my mom a scarf (which I eventualy pulled out completely) and then pulling out the other scarf I was making cause I don't like it anymore and then listening to my characters insufferable whining for a few minutes and then chatting with Lisa (and making some wacky and painfully honest realizations and conclusions about myself) I'm feeling a lot better than I was earlier today. So that is a total plus.

I'm being random and vague right now, I might have duck poisoning, but here are the lessons I've learned today...

-You can deny it all you want, but eventually it will come stare you right in the face. And when it does you can't blame anyone but yourself for not having seen it in the first place can you?

-When you hold on to the idea of something for a long time and then it goes away, you sometimes realize you never actually wanted it anyway. Which makes you strangely pissed off.

-Duck... in moderation only.

-I miss hanging out in big groups with my friends. Mostly because when we do that I'm the princess. But also because I really like my friends.

-Brigitte and I need to get really dressed up and get cocktails again soon.

Tomorrow if I can click on this magical free internet I promise to write a far more coherent blog. In the meantime here is my advice for everyone...

Just relax about it.