Cleaning

How does an apartment this tiny get this messy? It got to the point where even I couldn't deal with it so today is massive cleaning day. I've been bitching to my friend lately, my friend who has no name, about how much I miss my favorite pair of earrings, so when I found them under a pile of magazines on my nightstand we exchanged text messages that went like this...

"I found my earrings!"

"Where?"

"Under mags while cleaning!"

"It pays to clean!"

And then, literally, right then...I found 20 dollars. It was in a Christmas card from my grandma that I'd opened but never taken the money out of.

Now, if he would just send me a text message that says, "It makes you lose 30 pounds to clean"...