TV is Freaking Me Out

I'm housesitting this week at a house with both cable and On Demand. Needless to say, my brain is fried. After hours of "Toddlers in Tiaras" "18 Kids and Counting" "Demetri Martin" and "The Office" I officially hit my max a second ago, when I was flipping channels and came across my own mother in Spanish.

That's right. My mom was in the movie US Marshalls. She had one line. That movie was dubbed into Spanish. So while flipping channels I came across my mother, in her movie, but dubbed by a spanish lady.

This freaked me out more than "Toddlers and Tiaras" and the Duggars combined. It freaked me out even more than the other night when I watched this crappy show called "The Locator" about a guy who finds adopted people and birth families. In that episode, he reunited a 29 year old adopted girl with her birthparents who had subsequently had two more daughters. The Locator mentioned that this is rare and something "YOU NEVER EVER SEE" which made me laugh since it's my exact life. I wrote a strong email. Seriously.

During the Locator there was a commercial for one of those "Medical Freakshow" programs, you know, the ones that disguise themselves as exploring medical mysteries but are really no different than circus sideshows. The episode they were advertising was for "THE WOMAN WITH THE GIANT LEGS" who suffers from the "very rare disease" with the strange name "LYMPHEDEMA". At this point I threw a sock at the tv. First of all, it's not that rare...it's just rare that anyone including doctors knows anything about it, second of all...our legs aren't THAT giant.

I was waiting for a commercial for the new hit show, "Girl with brown hair named Brooke eating cake on her friend's sofa".

So, after seeing my life played out on reality TV in two languages, I've decided to flip it off now and do something normal...like reading my new book "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies."