A Concerned Reader...

Anonymous said...

WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM BITCH

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you so much for asking. You know, so often I post these blogs and think, "Is anyone even reading this? Does anyone even care?" But it is refreshing to know that there are people like you in this world who take time out of their, no doubt, very busy and hectic days to read what a stranger in Chicago thinks about peas and to shout their concern via blog comment.

I thought I had made it sort of clear, but I understand that you were unable to grasp the main thesis of my last post...not your fault, it was soaked in hidden meaning, subtext and innuendo...so perhaps I can summarize it for you more simply...I actually do not like Wasabi peas. Although I wouldn't really consider it a "problem"...more of an opinion. To bring it more to your level, much like you (rightfully) have deduced that I am a bitch (for not liking spicy peas), I think wasabi peas are a bitch (for being wasabi peas).

I hope I was able to clear that up for you. Thanks again for taking the time to read, create an anonymous account, and leave a comment. It's fans like you that have really helped to make this blog the success it is today. And while I have written about such topics as my views on political issues, the struggles of living with a chronic health condition, my opinions of theatre in Chicago, not to mention my extensive and thrilling (mind blowing, I would say) coverage of the Olympics...I did indeed understand that the "Wasabi Peas" entry would be highly controversial and would certainly outrage many of my faithful and dedicated readers, such as yourself. Sometimes, as bloggers, we have to take huge risks. Sometimes we just have to leap and not know where we will land. You know? Sometimes the bold statements, such as "I Don't Like Wasabi Peas" have to be made for the sake of the blog.

Thank you, Anonymous, for anonymously asking me to question what my problem is with flash dried, seasoned peas. You've really made me stop and consider the important things. Hopefully I can put this behind me and stop being such a bitch to dried fruits and vegetables in the future. As my friend mentioned in his comment, I need to "Give Peas A Chance."

Brooke

PS: Anonymous, remind me never to play "Apples to Apples" with you. It's not as fun to play it with people who take everything so literally.

PPS: Anonymous, Darling, most people have an invisible little stat-recorder on their blog which is quite detailed, so I'm afraid you aren't quite as anonymous as you'd hoped. Just something to keep in mind for future blog bashing. xoxo