Hi Kittens.
There will be a long post this week after Wednesday when I read aloud to a bar full of strangers what was once personal from my kitty cat diaries. Thank you to all those darlings who bought tickets on time and will be there to support me and laugh loud that night. Hopefully there will be a video. Rader, you are in charge of having a Cosmo at the ready for me the second I walk off stage. LOL. Wouldn't it be the most embarassing if I got so nervous that I had an asthma attack and had to use the nerdy inhaler right there on stage...then barfed...then fainted. It's gonna happen...and that alone is worth the ten bucks I think.
In other news...for those of you who don't know I moved into my parents attic. It sounds much more dramatic than it really is. It's not like I curl up in a trunk of old wedding gowns while staring at rusty nails and being haunted by oldsy timesy ghosts. It's actually the whole third floor of their house, so it's like an apartment. Yeah, that's it. It's only temporary, till I get a cuuuuute new place ALONE. But it makes me giggle a little. Especially when Mom calls and says "We made an extra turkey burger for you Sweetie, it'll be in the fridge if you're not home by 5:30." And it makes me giggle when I remember the first time I adultly lived with my parents in 2002 after graduating college. I was so excited and Chicago was my oyster. I just wanted to get a job anywhere, live in a studio wherever, work in theatre and party LIKE A ROCKSTAR. This now sort of feels like Secondchanceville. I'm pausing here and then I just want to keep working at my steady job, get a nice place that is painted, write for theatre, and hang out on the weekends but only until about 11.
I saw a girl last weekend in a bar flirting with the bartender and she had about half a roll of toilet paper hanging out the back of her jeans. I don't know how that even happens but I know it brought me bliss and joy and that made me question if I was a mean person at heart. I reconciled that I am not a mean person at heart since I would be annoyed but understanding of any girl who laughed at me were I to be in the same situation. I fully realize kharma will come and get me for not slyly walking up to this girl and helping her out...but I've found that bad kharma often leads to amazing stories later...so bring it. Plus, come on, it's not like I was laughing at a girl in a wheelchair...she had literally HALF A ROLL of TP hanging out her backside.
I have been having another round of knock out terrifying horrible nightmares again. This happens every few months and they last for a week or two. I'm talking like, bloody horrific horror movie stuff. And the only way out of them is if I can slip into lucid dreaming (long story) and wake myself up which has become harder to do since I am sleeping a lot heavier than normal. Hmm. I try now to tell myself what to dream about before I go to sleep and that seems to help.
I watched four movies this weekend.
1. The Return: (with a backwards "R" because those are scarier than regular "R"'s.) This movie starred Sarah Michelle Geller as the girl being chased and haunted, nice to see she's trying something new. There were a couple damn scary parts involving mirrors even though mirrors and horror movies go hand in hand. We decided every horror movie has the part where they close the medicine cabinet mirror and someone new is standing there and every horror movie also has the part where the lead is surrounded by files and archives until she finally discovers something amazing among the papers. Anyway, it was pretty scary and lame which is all you can hope for from a horror movie.
2. Talledega Nights: Sorry, I would love to say that I am way above this type of movie and that it was juvenile and brainless. But instead I pretty much laughed my ass off through the entire thing. It was REALLY funny. I don't even know why. "Dear 8 pound 6 ounce Baby Jesus, lying in your ghost manger....listening to Baby Einstein and learning about shapes...thank you for this food" I'm sorry...it just really made me laugh. Go forth and judge.
3. Shut Up and Sing: Oh Dixie Chicks. I never cared one way or another about the Dixie chicks before. But now I think I like them. It was a good movie.
4. Half Nelson. This independent film, in the spirit of all independent films, is totally depressing and ambiguous. At the end you think, "God, people suck. I hate this world." But I will say that Ryan Gosling is illegally attractive. Even as a crackhead.
That's all the news from the southside for tonight. I'll let you know how everything goes after Wednesday.
meow.
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4 comments:
I was ambivalent leaning towards positive about the Dixie Chicks until a) I saw them in concert at the United Center in August because my friend Jason insisted and b) saw Shut Up and Sing (again with Jason) two months later. Now I love them more than I love the 8 pound 6 ounce baby Jesus.
Oh Kris, you know how it goes.
PS: My word verification Word just now was "Owzogs" I feel like we need to incorporate that into every day speech.
Your post-performance Cosmo will be at the ready. I expect the first one to be chugged.
And my father made me watch TALLEDEGA NIGHTS when I was home for Christmas and I loved it!! It is truly one of the funniest movies I've ever seen. How can you not laugh as that little boy looking at Will Ferrell at the dinner table after his prayer to the Baby Jesus and saying...
"Dad, you made that grace your bitch!"
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