Trashy

Dear Cute Guy Waiting in His Nice Car to Pick Up His Friend in Our Alley Yesterday,

Hi.
It's me...remember? The girl you gave a little smile and wave to as I was taking out our trash. I just wanted to explain a couple of things to you. See, when I use the FRONT door I'm expecting to see people. People in their cars, people walking down the street. And I'm aware that I've moved to a neighborhood full of twenty something straight people so I really am more careful about my appearances....when I use the front door that is. Yes, the front door requires sunglasses and my ipod and a cute skirt and, you know, brushed hair.
But you see, the back door doesn't require any of that. Because the backyard is fenced in and I only expect to see our non-datable neighbors or my own roomates. And when I unhook the latch and step into the alley for 3 seconds I certainly do not expect to see attractive men in nice cars, such as yourself, parked right by my dumpster.
I don't normally look like that. Well, actually...I do. But only on Saturday mornings. Well, every morning really but what I'm saying is that I don't LEAVE THE HOUSE like that. (Unless I'm just going to Brannen's...he's my gay husband...wait, let's not get ahead of ourselves). Anyway, I know that you waved and I didn't wave back...it's not that I didn't want to. Frankly it's been so long since a cute guy smiled and waved to me that I was pretty ready to walk up to your car and hop in. However, sometimes girls like to think that they are superheroes. I like to think that I can just dissapear and never be seen. I don't generally like to wave back to cute guys when I'm rocking a top of the head ponytail, tanktop with no bra, jammie-pants with pictures of frog prince's on them (thanks mom) and flip-flop-slippers. Call me crazy.
I also wasn't wearing any make-up which isn't new since I rarely do anyway. Not because I'm a natural beauty...which, um, I am...but because make-up is so damn fussy and annoying. You see, Car Guy, I'm a bit of a Peter Pan and there are things about being an adult that I am only slowly letting in this year. My unemployment has made it possible for me to reflect on my life and my strange choices and...well, nevermind.
Also, our back gate tends to stick a little. And it's hard to get the latch to catch. Which would explain why I had to reopen it several times and all the clanking noises you heard. And sometimes when I'm embarassed or frustrated I do make strange little noises so the "eeeeeeak" that you hear, that was me...but I'm fine. Just bruised my pride a little.
I'm not really in a good place to date anyone right now, but, um, if you're ever in my alley again and if I ever take out the trash again...I'll try to smile and just wave back.
Oh, and I'll just wear solid colored jammie pants.
Love,
Sleepy Girl Taking the Trash Out on Saturday